Life At Pardes - Pardes Moments
Taking a Year Off Together
Many thought we were crazy to do what we did. And to be honest, there have been days that we agreed with them. In a two-month period, my husband, Max, and I opted to quit our secure jobs, get married, and then move to Israel for a year to study at Pardes. “And what will you be doing there?” many of our friends and family asked, and by “there” they inferred a conflict-ridden part of the world that seemed unsafe and unattractive. “Will you be in a graduate school program? Will you be learning something that will help you in your careers? Have you decided to become Rabbis?!” “Um … well no, not really.” We told them. “We’re just going to study – to take a year off – to reconnect with our Judaism and to the land of Israel – to start our marriage off on the best foot possible.” Few were convinced …
Before arriving at Pardes, I had never even picked up a Gemara nor spoken a word of Aramaic. So when my husband and I decided to become Havrutot (study partners) in our Mishna class, I was a little apprehensive. How could two people who knew little Hebrew and no Aramaic study together? Would we really be able to argue with the text and with each other in an appropriate way without either wanting to give up or kill each other? And what really was the point to learning Gemara anyway – we seemed to have been getting along just fine without it.
With these concerns in mind, my husband and I dove into Massechet Megillah and as such, embarked on our journey at Pardes and our year in Israel. We initially struggled a bit to get the hang of reading and interpreting the random and often disorganized content of the Mishna. But with the patience of a wonderful teacher and our hard work in the Beit Midrash, we began to look forward to our Talmud mornings each week. The texts were invigorating, forcing us to dig deep into the minds of the rabbis who were living almost 2,000 years ago while also influencing us to bring our own modern perspectives to the conversations. We became connected to our studies and began to push each other to explore further the values hidden in the code and to apply them to our lives today. By second semester, we couldn’t wait to begin learning Gemara. And as we continued to gain practice and exposure to the voices in our texts, we realized how far we had come from the start of our journey. Learning to study with another person in Havruta can sometimes be challenging, and even more so if you’re married to them! But through our determination to utilize each other’s strengths and our persistence to work every class together even when we became frustrated, we not only gained the skills to read a Suggia of Talmud, but we grew as a couple more than we could’ve imagined.
As the year is winding down, we are astonished at the progress we have made and are grateful that we took time away from our otherwise busy lives to focus on learning and on our marriage. We are now facing the challenge of deciding where to live next and what type of work we want to do going forward. Perhaps we should try to spend a little more time in the Beit Midrash before we depart – our Gemara might be hiding some good advice.
Jenny.
Englewood, Colorado
Northwestern University
Tax Consultant in Chicago
Year Program 2006-2007